Five Emotional Intelligence Strategies Every Teacher Can Use Tomorrow to Create Calmer Classrooms

Picture this… A student snaps a pencil, pushes their book away then sighs with that mix of frustration and overwhelm you can spot from across the room. You feel your own chest tighten. Your brain fires up with a quick message to react, correct, or raise your voice. Then you pause for half a second. You name what you are feeling. You soften your shoulders. You try something different.

That tiny pause can shift the entire moment. It changes the student. It changes you. It changes the tone of the room. These are the moments that emotional intelligence is built on. Not big dramatic strategies. Just small, human moves that build the culture students walk into each day.

Recently, our Founder, Dylan Sulzer joined the Around the School Table Podcast to chat about emotional intelligence in the classroom and how teachers can quietly change the atmosphere of a room through simple, relational actions.  Dylan dives into what it means to understand emotions, regulate them, communicate with purpose and build genuine connection with young people. His pathway from a rural upbringing to an emotional intelligence specialist sparks a fresh take on classroom behaviour, motivation and student identity.

The podcast episode is embedded below. Save it for your drive to school or your next planning block.

Why Emotional Intelligence Matters in Real Classrooms

Emotional intelligence is the ability to understand your feelings, regulate them, stay motivated, empathise with others and communicate in ways that build connection. These five areas are not soft skills. They are the foundation for learning.

When a student becomes overwhelmed, their prefrontal cortex loses access. Thinking shuts down. Planning shuts down. Even simple instructions feel impossible. Regulation practices reconnect the thinking parts of the brain so the student can return to learning.

The same thing happens for adults. Teachers often talk about feeling drained, stretched, or stuck. Emotional intelligence gives you tools to reset yourself before trying to reset the room.

Below are five emotionally intelligent moves you can start using tomorrow. Each one is practical, grounded in neuroscience and easy to apply without adding anything extra to your workload. Instead, they may just make your workload lighter, because they reduce emotional friction.

Emotional intelligence shows up in the small moments. A calm presence, a quiet check in, or a simple choice can shift a student from overwhelmed to engaged.

Five Moves You Can Use Tomorrow

These are simple, psychology-backed actions you can bring into any classroom. They reduce friction, strengthen relationships and create conditions for students to learn, even on the messy days. Each one fits naturally into real school moments without adding to your workload.

1. Name the Feeling

When something stressful happens in your classroom, your first reaction is usually physical. A hit of heat in your chest. A rush of pressure behind your eyes. A quick spike of frustration. Naming that feeling gives your brain a foothold. It stops the spiral. It brings the thinking part of your brain back online.

You can say it silently to yourself.
“I feel irritated.”
“I feel stressed.”
“I feel a bit overwhelmed.”

This tiny moment interrupts the emotional surge so you can choose a response that helps rather than reacts. Students notice this shift more than you realise. A regulated adult makes it safer for them to regulate too.

2. Offer a Choice Instead of Pushing Back

Many challenging moments in classrooms come from students trying to feel some independence. When you give a simple choice, you meet that need without losing structure. It can be as small as:

“Do you want to start with the heading or the first question.”
“Would you like to sit here or over there.”

The minute you introduce a choice, the resistance drops. You move from a tug of war to a partnership. Students feel respected. They feel like they can shape their learning instead of having it happen to them.

3. Use a Short Breathing Reset to Bring the Brain Back Online

When a student is overwhelmed, their brain cannot process instructions. They need a reset before they can learn. A quick structured breath helps. Try a simple four, three, two, one pattern.

Inhale four. Hold three. Exhale two. Pause one.

You can do this with the whole class or quietly alongside one student. Pair it with a clear next step like naming three things in the room that are blue. You can substitute any category here. The purpose is to provide the brain with an easy, low-stakes task that re-engages the prefrontal cortex (thinking brain). This combination settles their nervous system and gives their thinking brain something clear and achievable to latch onto.

4. Lead With a Strength Before Correcting a Behaviour

Students change faster when they feel seen for what they do well. When you name a strength first, the behaviour conversation feels safer and more collaborative. For example:

“I can see you think quickly. Let’s use that strength to get this started.”
“You are great at helping others. How can we bring that into this task.”

This approach shifts the student into problem solving rather than defensiveness. It also reinforces identity in a positive direction, which leads to stronger motivation and better follow through.

5. Build Real Connection Through Presence

Young people pay more attention to how you show up than what you say. Putting your laptop down, moving closer and asking a few genuine questions does more for behaviour than most warnings do. Try three quick ones:

“What’s made you smile today?”
“Tell me the most interesting thing that has happened since I saw you last.”
“What is one thing we can improve together.”

Your presence tells students they matter. It strengthens trust, which makes expectations easier to meet and support easier to accept. When the relationship feels solid, everything else runs smoother.

The Ripple Effect in a Classroom

Small emotional intelligence moves ripple outwards. One moment of naming your feeling reduces the chance of an escalation. One moment of offering choice softens resistance. One strength focused conversation shifts a student’s belief in themselves. Do these across a week and you get a calmer culture, better relationships and students who trust you enough to try.

This is the work Not Just A Teacher Education does with students, parents and educators. Emotional intelligence creates independence. It teaches young people how to respond to challenges without losing their sense of self.

Imagine doing one of these moves each day next week. Picture the shift by Friday.

Listen to the Full Conversation

Here is the featured episode of Around the School Table with Dylan Sulzer. The episode dives deeper into these ideas and explores how Dylan’s journey shaped his approach to emotional intelligence in schools.

Share it with your team. Play it in a staffroom. Use it as a conversation starter in your next PD. Teachers, parents, school leaders and anyone who works with young people will pull real value from it.

Teaching is emotional work. Not because students are difficult, but because humans are emotional creatures who want to feel seen and supported.
Emotional intelligence is the set of tools that help us do that without losing ourselves in the process. The goal is not perfection. The goal is presence. A small pause. A moment of choice. A breath. A strength. A conversation that reconnects you with the student in front of you.

Those moments change everything.